Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Deep discussions with little girls

 M has a dilemma.  She has an adorable baby brother that she just loves to pieces.  And she has parents that never let her hold him.  And when they catch her throwing him onto the couch, they tell her that she's not allowed to touch him at all.  It's harsh. 
On the day this all came to head, we talked about trust.  When you can trust something, it means you can expect that thing to do the same thing all the time, like the sun rising in the east.  And I told her it was like me staying up late might make me grumpy.  Adults and children can act in a way that you can't trust them.  But that some people lie a lot, and you can sort of trust them to keep lying.  It doesn't mean you should let them take care of your children.  But you can expect that behavior to happen again, and not be surprised by it.  M has amazing days, and she has days that she act like she's a 7 year old.  I explained that she's a child and that when I say "I can't trust you" it means I can't expect consistent behavior from her.  I can't expect her to be perfect every day, and that's ok.
Today we talked about people having bad self esteem.  My girls have the best self esteem.  It helps that they are gorgeous and smart and able.  I talked to them about S, a teen they know.  S has been the lead in the "Nutcracker" and is overall amazing and beautiful.  I ask M "Imagine if S thought she was ugly..."  We all had a good laugh over that, even though S probably does think she's fat.  Teen girls usually do.  So I told the girls that God made them.  Imagine if they drew a picture and the picture complained that it was ugly.  And I told them that Satan is the one who wants people to feel ugly. 

I think I'll mark this day on my calendar and review this annually.  It's a pretty important message.

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