Wednesday, August 29, 2012

be grateful for the nice things

When G was little he had Leukemia.  This required weeks in the hospital, and 2 years of constant fear of infection etc...  A nice upshot of this was that we get invited to the Dance Marathon, fundraising party, each year.

Last week while we were in the car M said "I'm so glad G was sick when he was a baby because we get to go to dance marathon."  It took me a while to figure out what to tell her.  I explained that G was really really sick and that his being sick wasn't something to be glad for.  She asked if he almost died.  And I told her that he almost died a lot of times.  That sobered her.

I am in fact grateful for the things we learned during G's sickness.  I'm also very grateful that our marriage survived as well as G. 

A few times, I've met ladies, who chose to have sex and children out of marriage.  Perhaps it is just a colloquialism, but they have said "I wouldn't do anything differently."  It's as if they feel that wishing to have made different choices is the same as wishing for the children to not exist.  Or maybe it's an unwillingness to admit that their choices have resulted in any negative effect on the children.

Sometimes we are given trials, and as we work through and learn from them we gain great things.  Sometimes we do stupid things and somehow despite this find ourselves blessed.  Recognize the stupid, recognize the grace.  Don't mistake one as the source of the other.

2 comments:

Gaia Iulia said...

However, I can say from Thad's experience that hearing your mom say "I wish I hadn't had sex out of marriage" does sound a lot like "I wish you didn't exist" to the kid involved. The one time that came up, he was very hurt and upset. I think saying "I wouldn't change anything", while it may be a complex and not entirely true statement, is the best policy if you're anywhere near your kid.

Lucky Day said...

That's true. There are a lot of things that shouldn't be discussed in front of kids. Harsh!

Give Thad a hug for me and tell him he's a super-hero.